The Master Teacher Blog

There is a surprising amount of confusion about the nature, intent, and effectiveness of feedback and praise. Some people may be providing praise when what is actually needed is feedback. Others may think that they are providing feedback when the content of their communication is really praise.  

A commonly offered differentiation between feedback and praise is that feedback is intended to improve performance while praise is intended to recognize it. In other words, praise faces backward while feedback faces forward. However, this description ignores both the role of feedback in helping students to understand what they did well and the power of praise to influence repetition of valued and desired behavior. Feedback at times may be a non-judgmental description of an action without a specific plan for next steps, and praise can be a straightforward recognition of something done well without an ulterior motive.  

Meanwhile, feedback and praise share some important characteristics. For example, feedback and praise are both most effective when they are specific. Generalized observations make neither feedback nor praise an effective behavioral influence. To have a behavioral impact, both need to focus on factors or behaviors over which the student has control. Focusing on good processes, effort, and choices are factors students can continue to invest in and improve; ability and mere circumstance are not. 

Furthermore, the recipients of feedback and praise can have different needs and may be open to different influences. For example, some people value praise, but only if it is in private. Others appreciate praise most when it is given in the presence of others. Feedback, on the other hand, should almost always be given in private, unless the feedback involves and is intended for an entire group.  

Of course, praise by definition is positive, and feedback can be either positive or negative. Although, it bears noting that the most effective feedback is presented in positive language and focuses on achieving success. Feedback at times will be negative, but too much negative feedback can quickly become overwhelming and block change rather than encourage it. Praise may be countered with criticism, but many experts recommend at least a 4:1 ratio of praise to criticism.  

Of equal importance is how students perceive the feedback or praise they receive. Neither feedback nor praise is effective if students see it as manipulative; that is, intended to serve our interests rather than theirs. They are not likely to respond to praise that is over-the-top positive, nor are they likely to accept feedback that is premised on their having knowledge and skills beyond what they possess.  

So why might this discussion be important? First, we need to recognize that there are times when feedback will be most effective in building understanding and creating a path toward success. It is a transparent, intentional process to support learning and behavioral change. There are other times and circumstances when praise can draw attention, provide reinforcement, and lead to behavioral change without the planning and structure that feedback requires. We need to base our choice on our awareness of circumstances, timing, and knowledge of the student.  

Second, regardless of whether we choose praise or feedback, we need to avoid the pitfalls of generalities, factors beyond learner’s control, and inauthenticity. If our intent is to have our words make an impact, we need to give students information with which they can do something. Of course, if we have no intent beyond communicating our observations, a simple statement may be enough.  

Finally, when employed with thought, sensitivity, and good judgment, feedback and praise can both be powerful tools to support the success of our students. Both actions can give students information they need to build motivation and guide choices and actions. Each can have slightly different purposes and may be delivered in varying contexts. However, both need to be part of our professional repertoire.  

What if investing less than five minutes per day could change our outlook, help us to become more optimistic, and make us feel better about ourselves? And what if this same set of activities could also leave others with whom we interact wanting to be around and spend more time with us? It may seem fantastical, but it might be easier than we assume. 

The power behind this shift resides in two fundamental truths. First, we tend to find what we look for. When we seek and expect to find good in others, we see more of it. Discovering more good leads us to being more positive and optimistic. Second, when we share with others what we notice about the positive behaviors and characteristics they demonstrate and the difference they make, they feel better about themselves and us. The more that we notice the good around us, the better we feel. The more we share with others the good they bring, the better they feel.  

The good news is that we do not have to allocate significant new time or add demanding tasks to our daily routines to experience such a shift. What is important is where we focus and what we prioritize. We need to look for specific actions, interactions, and impacts to collect and share. In fact, noticing as few as two or three things a day and sharing our observations with others is enough to get started.  

How we share our observations also matters. Mentioning what we notice is good, but for real impact and staying power, we need to spend at least twenty seconds adding details, examples, and context, and describing their impact. In fact, the twenty seconds we spend acknowledging a person’s strengths and impact can make their day or week—and maybe even shift the direction of their life. 

So, what should we look for? Here are five areas to begin: 

• Note someone’s area of strength and tell them. Everyone has strengths, including some of which we may not even be conscious. Hearing about them—and how they impact others—matters. Even when someone notices and calls attention to what we already consider our strengths, that makes us feel good, and we may be inspired to invest even more.  
• Look for someone’s contribution and mention it. Every day, people do things that make life and work better for others. The action may be something with a high profile, or it may be barely noticed. Regardless, our world works best when people are willing to act in ways that benefit others. Having these behaviors noticed can make practicing them feel more significant and often encourages even more contributions. 
• Listen for a good question and reinforce it. Schools are places where questions abound. Of course, not all questions lead to inquiry and insight and initiate action. When we hear a good question, regardless of the status of the source, we need to treasure it. We also do well to share our gratitude for the question, why we believe it to be important, and where it might lead. Our reinforcement can provide their reinforcement to build the courage to ask even more important questions.  
• Watch for a unique insight and capture it. Like good questions, insights are not always easily recognized. Our attention and support might be the stimulus needed for someone to continue to examine important challenges and uncover important knowledge.  
• Reflect on what we appreciate in others and share it. Even during trying times, there are people around us whose care, support, and general presence we appreciate. However, we may not take the time to tell these people what they mean to us and why. Hearing that they are valued and make a difference can easily make their day and more.  

We may be surprised to find that others are often not conscious of the power of their actions and the difference they make. Our willingness to observe and share the impact they have costs us little beyond our attention and a few minutes, if even that, of our time. However, our pointing out that difference lifts its significance and amplifies its impact. Best of all, we will have made the lives of others better while also enriching ours. 

When the influential people in our lives whom we respect notice unique characteristics and latent potential in us and share their observations, the impact can be dramatic and lifelong. However, their influence does not always have an immediate and visible impact. The “seeds” they plant can stay with us, eventually germinate, and ultimately grow into important drivers of the lives we build and paths we follow. Those of us fortunate enough to have had this experience know how powerful these comments, questions, and insights can be, as well as how much influence they can exert.  

We can be these influential people in the lives of our students. When we take the time to notice, question, and imagine what could be, we hold something special that may become life changing. When we share with our students what we see in and imagine for them, we can be a catalyst to unleash surprising commitment, emerging identity, and growing talent. What we share does not have to be a long conversation or “sermon.” They may be seemingly passing comments, casual observations, or incidental questions.  

The fact is that we can often see hints and glimpses of what the future of our students can be. However, most young people do not have the life experience or self-knowledge to fully appreciate what they can become. They also may be in family and community circumstances that fail to instill and support their becoming something beyond what is consistent with the history of the family and neighborhood.   

These comments, observations, and even urgings require little of us other than our attention to and insights about our students. Yet, the potential impact can be far beyond what we might hope or imagine. Here are seven examples to build on: 

• I hope that I am still around when you realize the full potential you possess. Most students are unaware of their potential. In some cases, the potential may be related to learning, or it may be in forming relationships and influencing others. Or it may develop in another aspect of life. The key is to plant the seed that the student has more to give and gain than their current aspirations and investment reflect.  
• I often wonder how much better you can become if you fully commit yourself. For some students, the opportunity to be better and the talent waiting to be developed is obvious, but their lack of commitment leads to uneven outcomes, unforced setbacks, and unnecessary barriers. Many students fail to realize what they could accomplish if they made a consistent commitment to accomplish what is important and meaningful to them. They do not need more intelligence or talent. They have what they need if they choose to consistently apply themselves. 
• I admire how you dig in when you encounter a challenge. Some students struggle and seem to make limited progress. Yet, they do not give up or give in. Despite the barriers and challenges they face, they possess special power in their persistence. In life, persistence is a more consistent predictor of success than intelligence. Often, students just need someone to recognize this special characteristic and encourage them to keep it up and know that their efforts will pay off.   
• I notice that when you take the time to think about an issue, you always seem to have a unique insight. Some students are quick to volunteer opinions and perspectives without giving much thought. Others are more deliberate and need a little more time. They may not be ready with a quick, often superficial answer. Both types of students can benefit from this observation. For the quick-to-respond student, this statement can be encouragement to take more time and think more deeply. For students who are more deliberate, this observation can offer important recognition and reinforcement for their approach.  
• Your level of curiosity has the potential to give you an amazing future. Curiosity is the gateway to learning. Even students who come from challenging backgrounds and may not have extensive academic background knowledge can find exceptional success when their curiosity is present, persistent, and pursued. When we encourage students to respect their curiosity and continue to ask questions, explore interests, and discover new ideas and insights, we can reveal for them a lifelong path of learning and success. Of course, we also need to be ready to hear and respond to more of their questions, ideas, and wonderings. 
• It would be amazing to see what would happen if you chose to use your leadership skills to make a positive difference. Many students who have special leadership skills and talents choose to use them in ways that distract the attention and undermine behavioral choices of other students. While they are practicing leadership, it can get in the way of their and other students’ success. This statement recognizes their skills and talents but nudges the application of leadership behaviors in a positive direction. Rather than fighting or seeking to undermine their leadership, we can encourage its application in a more positive direction.   
• I wonder what you will do with the talent you have yet to discover and develop. This statement suggests that the student may possess yet unrecognized talent. We open the door to a search and discovery that may surprise us and the student. The fact is that each of us holds the potential for special talents that we have yet to uncover and cultivate. Sometimes we just need someone to believe in what we may become. 

We have exceptional potential to influence our students. An encouraging observation, optimistic prediction, or insightful inquiry can make an amazingly positive difference. However, this same power, if used thoughtlessly, can sap the confidence of our students and leave undiscovered opportunities that assuredly exist for them. 

We want our students to have an experience with us that is memorable and impactful. We want them to look back on their time with us with warmth, pride, pleasure, and gratitude. However, such experiences usually do not just happen. The conditions necessary to generate exceptional experiences are created, nurtured, and protected.  

We also know that the conditions that engender these lifelong memories and feelings lead to high levels of learning, build confidence, and sustain engagement. Fortuitously, most of the factors that comprise these conditions are within our control; they do not necessarily require special expertise, exceptional technical knowledge, or unusual interpersonal skills. That being said, creating these conditions does require thought, persistence, and some specific beliefs. Here are five mindsets we can adopt that will position our students to thrive.   

Every student needs to feel included and supported. A sense of belonging is a powerful driving force for learning and behavior. Students who feel they are a part of a caring, supportive community are more likely to take learning risks, give their best effort, and persist in the face of setbacks. Students who feel the care and concern of adults in their lives are less likely to persistently act out and resist behavior expectations and guidance. Feeling included and supported sets the stage for engagement and success.  

Every student has the capacity to do better. Some students come to us with a record of high achievement and learning success. Others come with a history of struggle and lack of expected progress. Still, other students bring with them a trail of reasonable effort and moderate success. Regardless of their history, every student has the potential to do better and be better than their current performance indicates. When we approach every student with the mindset that greater success is in their future, good things almost always happen. Students can feel our confidence and expectations. Consequently, we can nudge and encourage students to reach higher and expect more from themselves.  

Students who misbehave still want to succeed. Some students may have experiences that lead them to wonder if success is even possible for them. They may believe that the “system” is not working for them, and they may have good reason to doubt. Still, everyone wants to be successful, even if their definitions and hopes of success vary. We need to resist being misled by the behavior we see. How we see our students drives what we say and what we do in response to them. This can be a challenge, but we must refuse to give up. Our power resides in our refusal to assume that students cannot change. If we remain steadfast in our belief, we will see the results we anticipate. 

I am the person who will make the difference for my students. Each of us can probably think of a teacher, coach, or other adult who had an outsized influence in our lives. These are special people to us, but for the most part, they are just regular people who chose to take an interest, expect more, and push us in ways we might not have expected of ourselves. Yet, their influence can be lifelong. We should not believe this special experience is reserved for someone else. We can be that person for our students. We are the key to making change happen. 

My enthusiasm is contagious. Excitement, curiosity, and wonder are difficult emotions to resist. We might worry that students will think that our energy is lame, and they may not respond. However, if we are sincere, even students who initially may resist and scoff still can be “infected” with our positivity. We need not be hesitant, or even measured, in our enthusiasm. It can ignite learning energy and create momentum. Before long, we can shift from creating energy to managing and guiding it. One thing is certain, a lack of enthusiasm is not what we want students to catch.  

Admittedly, teaching can be frustrating, difficult, and draining. Yet, few other professions offer the opportunity to change lives in such a profound manner. We nurture skills, instill attitudes, build character, spark hope, and form what can be lifelong relationships. We have within our reach the power to free students to thrive.

It has been said that the student who does not believe they can learn is the most difficult student to teach. Learning requires effort, risk, and persistence. This prospect can seem like a heavy lift for students who doubt their abilities, lack confidence, or have not experienced much learning success. In fact, all students are, at some points, likely to wonder about their capability and question their ability to succeed. 

Yet, the presence of hope for success is often the first step in the learning process. It opens the door for students to see the purpose and possibilities associated with learning. Still, it is a factor in learning that we may overlook and take for granted as we prepare to teach.  

When hope is lacking, investing energy and enduring the frustration that can accompany learning can seem like a “bridge too far.” In fact, it can be easier for students to see themselves as incapable and tell themselves that what they are asked to learn is not relevant, useful, or worth the effort. Such self-talk can actually feel better than risking engagement with an activity that may lead to embarrassment and shame.

Obviously, negative self-messaging undermines our efforts and our messages about the importance and value of learning. A well-prepared, focused, professionally prepared lesson is of little value if students are not ready or able to engage in the learning we have planned.  

To be clear, hope is not just voiced optimism or a naïve view of life. Hope is the realization that success is possible with patience, effort, strategy, and persistence. Hope is a key motivator that pushes and pulls people toward their goals. Equally important, students who are hopeful also are more likely to bounce back when they make mistakes and experience setbacks.  

The good news is that hope is a learnable skill. We can teach and nurture it. Here are five actions that can help us to get started.  

Create an emotionally safe learning environment. Students need to feel safe to take risks. They need to be free from the prospect of embarrassment and public criticism. Respect, valuing, and support are crucial elements of an environment in which students feel safe to take risks and learn. Of course, a safe learning environment by itself is not enough, but it is a condition that we need to create to make taking learning risks feel like a reasonable commitment.  

Conduct empathy interviews. The more we understand about students who struggle to gain and sustain hope, the better able we are to reach and teach them in this crucial area. Explore the student’s history with learning, including that which occurs outside of school. Inquire about past challenges they have confronted and overcome to find success. Nudge for details about what they did, how it worked, and how they felt. What we learn from these conversations can provide helpful reminders and levers to instill, nurture, and sustain hope. Finally, assure students that we want them to experience this type of success, and the feelings that accompany it, over and over in our class.  

Give students a sense of control. Hope is closely associated with a sense of control. Helping students to see connections between their efforts and learning outcomes can be crucial to the development of hope. We can start with small things: making choices about activities, what to do first, with whom to work, and so on. Over time, we can expand and build choices to include use of time, learning strategies, and other learning drivers. The goal is to help students gain a sense of agency relative to their learning.  

Coach students to set goals. Goals are tangible elements of hope. Goals create a path to the future. We can help students to break goals into specific, actionable steps so they can see how they can get from where they are to where they want to go. At first, the goals may be modest and short-term, but over time they can build into more challenging and significant learning targets. Initially, students likely will need instruction, coaching, and support. However, we need to be careful to ensure that the goals are owned by the student. If students perceive the goals as ours, we will have lost much of the leverage the goals can provide. 

Encourage students to reflect on and talk about hope. At first, students may be reluctant to discuss this aspect of their learning. To build awareness and comfort, we might start with activities such as writing about or discussing a sentence stem like “Today, I hope…” as a warm-up activity and collect or invite reflections at the end of class. We might share vignettes of people who persisted and prevailed in the face of a challenge because of the power of hope. We can also connect examples of how the power of hope led to solving complex and difficult challenges related to our subject area to make a connection with what students are learning. As students become more comfortable and conscious of the power of hope, we might even have them write a letter to their future selves describing who they hope to become and why. 

We do well to remember that the level of hope in people ebbs and flows. We may see progress one day, followed by a day that will require more attention and reassurance. Experiences and circumstances can impact hope, especially as students are building confidence and growing the power of their hope. We must be patient without giving up. As hope grows, we can be assured that in the face of struggles and setbacks, we will see students bounce back faster and persist longer.

As educators, we always need to be alert to the moods, messages, and mental states of our students. When their behavior shifts from engaged to withdrawn, from talking nonstop to total silence, from carefree to cautious, and so on, we are seeing signs and symptoms of situations that may need our attention. It is important that we not only notice these and other indicators, but that we also take action and respond to them.

However, there are specific occasions when our students particularly need us to have our “radar” up and our alert observation fully engaged. These are times when the emotional states of our students may be signaling that all is not right, and our immediate attention is needed. Let’s examine four of these times when students may need our increased attentiveness.

The first and most frequent times are Fridays, especially Friday afternoons. During the week, students may face a tough evening, with fighting, disruption, and chaos, but they know that in the morning, they will return to school where routine, predictability, and adults who monitor and care for them will be present. The next day may also mean a nourishing breakfast and filling lunch. However, the weekend may mean two days of uncertainty, anger, and violence. It also may mean little to no food and several nights of little sleep. In our classrooms, we need to be especially aware of mood shifts, reluctance to leave, and even angry and disruptive outbursts. Of course, not every student who faces these challenges may show obvious signs. Often, children and young people from families that seem to be healthy and happy are living in something far from it. We need to be careful not to confine our focus exclusively to students who may have a history of or come from families where disruption and chaos are obvious.

A second crucial period of time is those days leading up to extended calendar breaks. Like weekends, breaks in the calendar and extended days away from school can mean loss of routine, extended disruption, little sleep, and not enough food. Additionally, adults in the lives of our students may experience additional pressures and frustration during these times that will make the lives of our students even worse. Increased anxiety, nervousness, anger, and sadness can be signs that students are fearful or dreading the time away and may even need additional support.

A third circumstance emerges when parents may be about to receive bad news concerning their children, such as those days when report cards are sent home, parents have been called in for a conference, or we need to reach out with less-than-positive news. Several studies have shown that when report cards are sent home, especially leading up to weekends or holidays, reports of child abuse go up. Adults in the lives of our students may respond to disappointment and take out frustrations on their children and adolescents by engaging in physical punishment and mental abuse.

Another time when students may experience strong emotions is during days leading up to significant social and school events. Students who have not been invited, are ineligible, or for whatever reason will not be able to participate can find these days filled with shame, embarrassment, and disappointment in being “left out.” While this type of experience may be part of growing up and being human, they also can be painful times when students need our attention. To us, it may feel as though a student is overreacting, and we may find ourselves thinking that they should not be so upset; for the students in these circumstances, however, life can feel unfair and even hopeless.

Of course, noticing that a student is feeling upset or anxious is only the first step. Depending on the situation and emotional trauma the students is experiencing, we have several options to provide support. Here are some actions we can consider once we have assessed the situation:

• We might assure the student that we are paying attention to them and that we care and are willing to listen. Our empathy and support may be enough to help the student gain perspective and face what lies ahead.
• After listening to the student, we may be able to help them develop a plan to find their way through the situation. We might explore some safe and healthy options or identify someone they can contact if they feel unsafe or need a higher level of support.
• We may find that we need to alert someone in the student’s life to monitor and engage in the situation. Sometimes a relative or other connected adult can be the person to provide the support and assistance needed.
• Sadly, there also are times when we need to alert someone with the skills and authority to intervene. We may feel reluctant, not wanting to potentially overreact before something happens, but we also have a responsibility to do what we can to be certain that students will be safe.

The lives of our students are frequently complicated and challenging. Some of what they experience is a normal part of growing up, and we may need to help them to build skills and strategies to cope and grow. In other circumstances, we may need to lean in, provide our support, or connect them with resources that can protect them and keep them safe. Regardless, our entry point is our attention and concern. Our students need us to watch over and care about them; what we notice, what action we take, and what support we give can make a world of difference.

When it comes to learning about us, students learn as much from what they see as what we say. They learn innumerable lessons about us—and how adults and professionals behave—through our actions, interactions, and reactions.  

We can try to counsel, coach, and convince students to adopt important values and engage in positive social behaviors, but as attentively as students may appear to listen, what they see in our attitudes and interactions typically carries far more influence on what they will believe and, by extension, adopt. Unless we demonstrate the values and practice the behaviors that we want our students to demonstrate, we are likely to be disappointed.  

Every day, we give our students opportunities to observe and learn from what they see and experience in our presence. Let’s examine five common circumstances in which our attitudes and behaviors are scrutinized and which can present our students with lessons about learning, relationships, and life.  

How we handle interruptions, regardless of the source, sends a message about our temperament, flexibility, and readiness to understand the needs and issues of others. Interruptions to our instruction and class routines are inevitable. Some interruptions are predictable, such as daily announcements. Some come without warning, such as summoning a student to the office or reminding everyone of a change in schedule. Other interruptions can result from unexpected events within the classroom or a knock on the classroom door. In our responses, are we focused on our own needs and priorities, or are we quick to respond accordingly and provide support? Do we readily shift our attention, or are we more likely to roll our eyes, or otherwise express frustration, while we wait to return to our own agenda?  

How we treat colleagues shows students our generosity and collaborative spirit, in addition to our respect and valuing of others. We may not think that students pay attention to our interactions with other members of the staff. However, they are constantly watching and learning. When we are quick to help, pass along important information, or share materials and equipment, students see our willingness to give and to collaborate. Additionally, but no less importantly, how we treat non-licensed staff members, such as custodians, paraeducators, secretaries, and volunteers, also sends a message to our students about our character.   

How we treat other students communicates the depth of our commitment to provide equitable and even-handed support, encouragement, and acceptance. Not surprisingly, students also closely watch how we relate to other students. They notice how we treat students who experience learning challenges, may need to navigate language barriers, or come from difficult economic circumstances or from a different culture or race. Do we consistently and equitably provide the support they need to build their skills and experience success? Additionally, students notice whether we place our relationship on the line with students who engage in challenging behavior, or if we separate the behavior of which we do not approve from our opinion and treatment of the student. Of course, they also are watching to see if some students regularly receive preferential treatment without an apparent reason. How we treat some students in our classes often serves as a measuring stick for other students to judge our fairness and imagine the implications for them should they find themselves in similar circumstances.  

How we respond to questions tells students about our ability and choice to be patient, emotionally mature, tactful, and professional. Questions can play a variety of roles in our experiences with students, but they matter regardless of the age and maturity of our students. Our youngest students may have endless questions, and they can try our patience. Older students may ask fewer questions, but the questions they do ask can be difficult and uncomfortable to answer; they may test our tact and sensitivity. Some questions can even be calculated to intentionally “press our buttons.” Yet, those, too, allow us to demonstrate our emotional stability and our professionalism. 

How curious we are can show our students our willingness to analyze, investigate, and pursue the connections, possibilities, and significance of what is presented to us. Our days are filled with stimuli that can stir our curiosity. Students say and do surprising things. Serendipitous events can stir our emotions or leave us smiling or rapt with wonder. We may be engaged in a planned lesson or structured discussion when a spontaneous observation or connection surfaces that begs to be explored. What happens next is of the utmost importance. We can choose to ignore what happens “off script,” or we can choose to pause and explore those sources of curiosity. The nature, strength, and richness of our curiosity can make a lasting impression on our students; these can be the “teachable moments” our students will treasure. They can stimulate an interest that grows into a student’s passion. Of course, our excitement in not only showing our own curiosity, but also sharing it, can give students permission to imagine, explore, and appreciate the unusual, unexpected, and unexplained.  

The most powerful lessons our students are likely to learn are the ones we teach without a lesson plan or clear intention. Our choice to be a model for students to emulate will provide rich lessons for them to learn. Of equal importance, doing so allows us to create a more successful and satisfying environment within which to practice our profession. 

We may think that students should come to us with an inherent understanding of our commitment to them and their success. After all, we chose this profession to make a difference in the lives of learners. However, our students may have experiences and perceptions that lead them to doubt our investment, or at least be unclear about what to expect, as they begin a new year with us. 

As we begin the school year, now is a good time to share with students our commitments and assure them that they can rely on us to ensure their success. Our choice to be direct with students about our commitment to them and their learning is also an expression of our professional confidence and competence to be able to support their success. Further, when we share our commitment to our students, we also solidify our commitment to ourselves.  

But what can we say to give students confidence and reassurance that they can be successful—and that we will be there to support and guide them? Here are five statements that communicate what we are committed to offer and what they can expect from us.   

I am committed to: 

• having you feel that you belong here. You are a member of this class. You do not have to prove yourself, and you do not have to pretend to be someone you are not. You are accepted and valued as you are. I will strive to plan learning activities that meet your needs, tap your interests, and build your skills.   

• your success. My goal is to help you not only believe in yourself and your potential, but also to commit to doing your best. Together we will figure out what we need to do to make your success possible. I have lots of experience and loads of ideas and strategies to share. I will be ready to support you when you need me. With us working together, I am confident that you will succeed.   
• helping you discover and develop your talents. You may know what your talents are, or you may not. You may not even be convinced that you have something special within you, but you do. Of this I am confident. We will launch this search together. I know that we will succeed. 
• not give up on you. You will struggle at times. You may even be tempted to give up on yourself, but I will nudge, budge, and badger you because I know that you can do it. The fact is that I cannot succeed unless you do. We are in this work together, and I want you to succeed. I may not always approve of your choices and behavior, but I will always value and believe in your potential to grow, learn, and become a better person, learner, and choice-maker.  
• making every day an opportunity to begin fresh. We will have difficult days. We may struggle. However, when we return each day, we can have it be a new start, and together, we can make it a better day than the one before it. 

You may have additional commitments you want to share with your students. Please add them to those on this list that resonate with you. What is most important is that our students know what to expect from us and that they experience, firsthand, the power of our commitment to them.

One of the persistent questions students ask themselves is whether they are in a class wherein they are treated fairly and equitably. They watch for signals that we notice and care about them, and they monitor our interactions with other students to see if they detect a special relationship and treatment.  

We may believe students should not worry about such things in our class, as we know that we are committed to fairness and the avoidance of favoritism. Yet, what matters more than that is what our students perceive and think. For many students, how they perceive us determines whether they will invest in their learning with us, follow our leadership, and respond to our expectations. A climate of value, respect, and fairness will influence how successful and satisfying this year will be. 

So, how can we avoid the reality and dispel the perceptions of favoritism with our students? A good place to start is by recognizing when and where favoritism can surface—and what we can do to counter it. Here are eight of these counteractions to consider. 

#1: Address the issue of favoritism openly and directly. Sharing our intentions to have everyone feel valued and supported will dispel many concerns and provide reassurance. This action also sets expectations for a climate of fairness and even-handedness. We might also explain that there will be times when not everyone will be treated the exact same, and when that happens, there will be a good reason for it; to borrow a medical analogy, we would not treat a bruise the same as a break, or a minor scrape the same as a deeper cut. This could then lend itself to a conversation about equality versus equitability.  

#2: Pay attention to seating assignments and arrangements. If we assign seats, we need to avoid having some students, such as those who are quick to volunteer and show enthusiasm, consistently placed in the “magic T” (the seats across the front of the room and down the middle). Multiple research studies show that students placed in these seats tend to receive more of the teacher’s attention and interactions. Meanwhile, students along the sides and in the rear corners are more likely to be overlooked and ignored.  

#3: Monitor participation in discussions. We need to be careful to avoid relying on certain students for participation, such as those who are quick to raise their hands and respond. Some students simply need more time to think before they are ready to offer a response. We also need to be aware of how we react when students give incorrect or weak answers. Showing impatience, frustration, or disinterest and quickly moving on to another student can easily be read as lack of value and respect.  

#4: Distribute special activities, assignments, and duties equitably. Students, especially in the early grades, enjoy opportunities to lead and serve in the classroom. They appreciate the attention and recognition that goes along with distributing materials, greeting guests, leading the class to lunch, and performing other daily activities and routines. While there are times when certain students need extra attention and responsibility, we need to be careful to distribute these assignments beyond a select group of students.  

#5: Be consistent in expectations. Students can be quick to pick up on any inconsistencies in the behaviors we accept and address. Do some students seem to “get away” with behaviors that are called out for other students? Students also notice if some of their classmates seem to receive higher grades for work that is similar in depth and quality to that of their peers. Of course, there are times and circumstances when we may need to, even temporarily, adjust our expectations and be especially flexible in how we treat behaviors and assignments. However, we need to guard against practices and patterns that send a message that some students matter more than others.  

#6: Monitor nonverbal behaviors and signals. Students are especially attuned to our nonverbal communication. Tone of voice can be just as important and powerful as the actual words we choose. Additionally, facial expressions can communicate much about our thinking and intentions. Even the hand signals we use to encourage, discourage, and reinforce behaviors are read as expressions of our feelings and intentions. 

#7: Work to develop a relationship with each student. Brief personal conversations, encouraging reminders, questions about life outside of class, and other similar expressions of interest and value can make a world of difference. Of course, it is easier to form strong relationships with some students than with others, but every student deserves our attention, interest, and support. We might even keep a log of our interactions with individual students to monitor whether we are giving all students the time and focus we intend.  

#8: Practice self-reflection. We may assume that we are treating all students equitably, but unless we take the time to truly examine our behavior, we risk being perceived differently than we intend. We might invite a colleague to observe us as we teach and watch for signs of favoritism or preference. We could give students opportunities for feedback through confidential, anonymous surveys. Of course, we can also monitor student comments and behaviors; if students feel that our treatment is unfair, they are likely to communicate their thoughts and perceptions to each other—and sometimes even to us. 

Our goal should be to have every student believe they are our favorite. When all students experience our interest, concern, and empathy, and when they feel our commitment to and belief in them, that goal is within reach.