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Six Surprises to Expect in the First Weeks of School

Regardless of how many new school years we have experienced, it seems that every year there are elements of the new start we fail to recall or expect. We may even find ourselves thinking something along the lines of “Whoa, I forgot that my new students would be like this.”

After all, the summer has given us psychological distance from the routines and realities of the classroom. We have had time to allow memories to fade and even for some assumptions to form. For example, we may assume—without reflection—that our new students will be like the students we sent on their way in May or June.

It is true that each school year offers a new beginning. It also means we will be starting where we started last year, not where we ended. The students we will meet are likely to present several surprises, even though we may have been through this yearly cycle multiple times.

As we prepare to meet our students, there are several realities to keep in mind to minimize surprises and be prepared for what lies ahead. Here are six start-of-the-new-year truths that are likely to mystify us if we are not ready to deal with them.

Students will seem younger and less mature than we expect. We can easily forget that our new students are nearly a year younger than the students we finished with the previous year. While students’ appearance and behaviors may surprise us, they are likely to be just about where last year’s students were when the year began. As the year unfolds, we will again have a front-row seat as students grow, mature, and end the year in places not much different from those of the students we said goodbye to in the spring.

Students will have forgotten more than we expect. Depending on the students’ summer, they may have had few opportunities to use, refresh, and build on what they learned last year. Consequently, some of what students knew and could do when school ended in the spring may not be immediately available to them when they return. Review, reinforcement, and even some reteaching will probably be required before students are ready to engage in new learning.

Students’ readiness to learn will be more varied than we expect. Not unlike what students may have forgotten over the summer, they will return in the fall at different levels of readiness to learn. Some students may have had a traumatic summer, some may have lost skills due to neglect, and some may have had a stimulating, academically rich summer. A successful beginning to the new year will require understanding of where students are in their learning readiness and what we need to do to engage and support them.

Students will take longer to learn and follow routines than we expect. Routines may have seemed like second nature by the time school ended in the spring. In fact, we may have had to give little thought to managing and reinforcing routines after students spent months in our presence and under our influence. Unfortunately, the students we encounter as school starts may be unfamiliar with our routines and expectations. Our challenge will be to return to the basics, explain the importance of routines, give students opportunities to practice, and provide ongoing guidance and feedback. Of course, they will also need our patience.

Students will be more anxious than we expect. We can forget that we represent a significant and even scary unknown to many students. They will be trying to figure out what life will be like in our presence. Some students may show far less anxiety than they feel. Other students may act out, seem distracted, or even be defiant as they sort through what to expect in the year ahead. Obviously, we need to do what we can to inform and reassure students about the rich, meaningful experiences we have planned and the accepting and supportive class community we intend to build.

Student relationships will take longer to develop than we expect. By the end of the previous year, we had developed strong relationships with students. They had learned to trust us, feel free to take learning risks, and depend on us for understanding and support. Unfortunately, the new students with whom we will begin the year will not have had the experiences of last year’s class. They likely have had varying experiences with adults, some of which may leave them reluctant to form relationships. Our challenge is to understand that building relationships will take time and remind ourselves that the investment we make will help the year go better and our students to learn more.

The beginning of a new school year is an exciting time. Months of discovery, engagement, challenge, and progress lie ahead. However, we must remember that each year, students come to us where last year’s class started, not where they ended. We need to give ourselves space and grace to find our way and our rhythm with this new group of students.

July 22, 2026

Five Everyday Habits That Can Compromise Relationships

Habits are often formed without a deliberate decision or intent. We might find ourselves engaging in certain behaviors under certain circumstances, such as when we are upset, disappointed, frustrated, or hurt. However, once the situation has passed or the circumstances have changed, we might continue the behavior. Our sour attitude persists, our perspective remains negative, or our blaming continues.

We might enter a cycle of behavior that feels natural, even though it may not be helpful or healthy. It is possible that we do not even realize what we are doing or how our behavior affects others. If left unaddressed, these negative, often self-defeating behaviors become established habits that persist unless we recognize their impact and commit to change.

In many life contexts, people can choose to overlook negative habits or physically remove themselves from dealing with them. However, when certain habits carry over into teaching and leadership roles, they can be especially destructive. Students and colleagues do not always have choices to remove themselves and avoid the impact of the behavior. In fact, some behaviors can get in the way of our instruction and even undermine our students’ learning. Consequently, we need to be vigilant to ensure our behavior is healthy, helpful, and positive. Here are five of the most common negative behaviors that can become destructive habits, along with strategies to counter them.

Sarcasm. This behavior can be subtle. In fact, it may initially surface as well-meaning humor. However, the impact often comes when, instead of being used as an intentional tool to relate to our snarkier students, it becomes a habit we employ thoughtlessly; then, it comes across as disrespectful and cutting, causing shame or hurt in its recipients. For example, saying “Nice of you to join us” when a student arrives late conveys anything but a welcoming gesture. Or joking “Well, that is one way to get it wrong” is not sending a message of support. Even though sarcastic remarks can at times elicit laughs and factor into relatability, especially for those of us who teach teens or pre-teens, they might more often undermine trust, discourage risk-taking, and strain relationships.

Counter habit: Use neutral language rather than casting judgment. Replace with respect, authentic support, and warmth.

Cynicism. While less overt than sarcasm, this behavior conveys low expectations and a dismissive attitude. The implication may be that nothing can be done, things cannot be changed, and efforts to make a difference will be fruitless. Statements such as “Most of them will not study anyway” and “We’ve tried that before; it never works” convey a lack of hope and can send students the message that they cannot or will not learn difficult things.

Counter habit: Replace with credible optimism. Focus on conditions to make a difference. Think “not yet” rather than “not possible.”

Emotional disengagement. The behavior shares some characteristics with sarcasm and cynicism, but it is even more passive. Emotional disengagement is often associated with burnout. It involves low levels of effort investment. It is often described as “going through the motions” or “mailing it in.” The behavior can involve mindlessly repeating lessons one may have taught dozens of times, letting expectations slip, and feeling bored. Students quickly sense when emotional disengagement becomes a pattern and often scale back their investment in effort in response.

Counter habit: Focus on being present and creating moments that matter. Vary routines and explore new approaches.

Assuming negative intentions. When students behave in unacceptable ways, refuse to commit to performing at their best, or fail to persist in the face of challenges, this habit assigns blame and metes out criticism. Rather than investigating the cause of the behavior, the conclusion is that the student chose to misbehave, was lazy, or did not care. Student behavior can result from a variety of factors, including some over which the student may have little or no control. Unfortunately, hastily drawn negative conclusions and unfounded blame often lead to emotional separation, resentment, and even reduced effort in the future.

Counter habit: Replace immediate conclusions with curiosity. Pause and inquire before deciding. Separate student behavior from their identity.

Excessive hurrying. We may feel as though we must rush to do all that is asked and expected of us. We might feel pressure to hurry through units or a series of lessons. We might find ourselves rushing through our reviews of student work and pressuring students to move faster in their learning. Unfortunately, pressing can mean superficial instruction and learning. Feedback to students may be perfunctory and generic. Students may feel that complete understanding and deep learning are not priorities. Unfortunately, the habit of rushing teaching and learning processes can exact a high price in missed learning.

Counter habit: Think purposeful pacing over coverage. Focus on understanding, retention, and transfer over exposure. Remember: If it is worth doing, it is worth doing well.

Habits can be helpful for instilling good practices and useful routines. However, they can also get in the way of what we want from our work and life. We need to be certain that they help us to think and grow, not become barriers to achieving what we want for ourselves and others in our lives.

July 09, 2026

Five End-of-Year Emotions and What to Do with Them

The end of the school year can be filled with complex emotions. For the most part, this is a natural part of closing out what has been a significant and extended investment of time, physical and mental energy, and interpersonal engagement. What we feel now likely represents the cumulative experiences, interactions, and challenges this past year presented to us.

Our emotions can also seem contradictory. Some emotions may lift our spirits, while others leave us deflated. For example, we might feel triumphant to have successfully finished the year and sad that we will no longer be a part of our students’ lives in the way we have been for the past months.

Each emotion we experience carries meaning for us. They are not necessarily problems to be solved, nor are they feelings we should ignore or pack away without examination. Rather, they are evidence that the work we did throughout the year mattered. They can be symptoms to examine, they may stir memories to treasure, and they might remind us of what the work means to us and of how much we have invested in it. Let’s examine five common emotions teachers often experience at the end of the school year, what they might represent, and what we might do with them.

Relief

Relief is often one of the first emotions we experience as we close out the year and send students out the door for a final time. It is not inherently a negative emotion in this context. Rather, relief can simply be the feeling that a load of responsibility has been lifted. It is evidence of the investment of mental and emotional energy, as well as the stress we have been feeling. In short, relief is a signal that the pressure has eased.

What to do with it:

Let yourself appreciate feeling relieved without guilt.

Resist, to the extent possible, immediately filling the space relief created.

Consider what created the greatest stress and strain and whether you might adjust routines, approaches, or boundaries to lessen the load next year.

Remember that relief is evidence of commitment and investment in your work.

Pride

There are many reasons to feel pride as the year comes to a close. We have watched students learn and grow academically. We have seen commitment and persistence. Students who began the year as one person have (hopefully) matured into another. They have learned important new skills and are ready for new challenges. Our pride also extends to what we have accomplished. Goals we set at the beginning of the year can now be celebrated as accomplishments. We, too, have persisted. We have learned through our experience and reflection and from lessons students taught us, whether intentional or not. The source of our pride is not perfection; rather, it comes from never giving up on students or ourselves and finding our way regardless of the challenges we face.

What to do with it:

Document the successes and accomplishments you achieved before they fade from memory. Physical or digital journals or binders compiled of miscellaneous notes work just fine, as do keepsake boxes or even a shelf of mementos in your classroom or office.

Create or add to your file of thank-yous, compliments, and other expressions of appreciation. These items can be good reminders when you need something to pick you up and remind you of the significance of what you do.

Share your accomplishments with a trusted colleague, family member, friend, or other person who understands and values you and what you do.

Gratitude

This emotion is often strongest when we have faced difficult challenges, found our way through, and emerged whole. We realize the power of connections, support, friendships, humor, and kindness. Yet every year, regardless of the challenges, we succeed with the support, assistance, and care of those around us. Gratitude helps balance frustrations and disappointments with opportunities to make a difference in the lives of others, to experience colleagues who share our commitment, and to engage in the work of creating a better future.

What to do with it:

Make a list of things that you are grateful for and reflect on how they enrich your life.

Share the gratitude you feel directly with those who make you feel grateful—students, colleagues, parents, friends, and family members.

Be open and accepting when people share why they are grateful for you, and resist minimizing or dismissing the significance of what they say.

Loss

We might anticipate excitement, joy, and elation as the end of the year approaches, only to discover that when the final day passes, we feel as though we have lost something. We may feel numbness, emptiness, and even downright sadness. We can experience these feelings when we have been particularly close to a class or group of students. The end of the year means the special relationships and experiences that filled it have come to an end. Our students will move on without us. At the same time, we have many wonderful memories to revisit and a reminder of what is possible when just the right mix of people, timing, and opportunity come together.

What to do with it:

Spend time reflecting on the experiences you shared and the opportunities you offered.

Remember that even though the students will move on, your influence will continue. You may never know how their lives changed because of their time with you.

Remind yourself that the experiences you shared with these students, while unique, can be at least somewhat recreated with future classes.

Appreciate the special opportunities your work gives you to make a difference in the lives of the students you touch.

Exhaustion

The end of most school years leaves us feeling tired. We invested deeply in the success of the students we taught. The workload is heavy, and opportunities for rest and renewal during the year can be scarce and short. Nevertheless, after some years, the feeling of exhaustion is deeper and more pervasive. Prolonged emotional stress, overextension, and other factors can leave us feeling emotionally and physically depleted. These are times to pay special attention and plan for recovery.

What to do with it:

Make rest and recovery priorities.

Delay extensive reflection and any changes until feelings of exhaustion have eased.

Identify the primary sources of energy drain. They might be rooted in conflict, a lack of autonomy, an inability to see your impact, expectations of perfection, or something else.

Determine what is within your control, what you can influence, and what you cannot control. Use your analysis to create a plan to reduce energy and emotional drain where you can and explore ways to manage your response to what you cannot control.

Resist making major life and career decisions while your energy is depleted.

Enjoy, embrace, and relish the emotions that bring you joy and satisfaction. Resist suppressing or overanalyzing the emotions that drain energy or pull you down. Rather than being judgmental, be curious, give yourself time before acting, and focus on what you can control.

Obviously, these are not the only emotions teachers are likely to experience as the year draws to a close. What other emotions do you notice, and what have you found useful in response?

June 12, 2026

Shape Students for Life: 5 Transformative Teacher Habits

One of the most rewarding aspects of teaching is hearing from former students about the profound and lasting impact we have had on their lives. They might describe a characteristic or value we demonstrated and instilled in them, emphasize the impact of a special project or challenge we presented that convinced them of what they could achieve, or they might tell us of how really seeing and believing in them and their potential gave them confidence to shift their perspective and aspire to more than they had imagined possible. The list could go on.

However, it all begs the question: What is it that we do that can have such a life-changing, lifelong impact? We may not see or understand the influence we have on some students in real time. We might never know our impact on others. Yet, we have the opportunity every day, every week, and every year to change students’ lives and give them access to possibilities that never would have occurred to them without spending time with and learning from us.

So, what are some of the most impactful behaviors in which teachers engage that hold the potential to change lives? Here are five behaviors people point to when describing educators whose imprint shifted the trajectory of their lives.

“Seeing” students. Students want to feel seen. They seek reassurance that they are worthy and matter. For students who often do not feel seen, the experience can make an outsized difference. Having teachers greet them by name, be interested in and remember details about their lives, and notice when something is bothering or distracting them communicates the message that “You matter to me.” Being truly seen can be enough to carry students through a difficult time and give them confidence to keep on keeping on.

Believing in students. All students want teachers who believe in them, but for students who do not yet believe in themselves, the experience can be transforming. Having an important person in their lives see potential they have not considered or believed they possess opens new possibilities and freedom to dream. When students do not yet believe in themselves, a teacher’s confidence can serve as borrowed confidence until they do. When students feel the confidence of a trusted adult, they can aspire to high standards, knowing they can succeed.

Being fully present for students. Having someone’s full attention and commitment to understand can be a rare and precious gift, especially for students with few caring adults in their lives. Students remember teachers who were mentally in sync with them rather than rushed, distracted, or detached. Teachers who are ready to listen, engage, and assist are important and appreciated, especially when students are facing life challenges, confused, or in crisis.

Refusing to give up on students. Teachers who remain committed, nudge students to do their best, and always get better matter to students. Students can become discouraged, convinced they cannot succeed, and may even want to abandon the struggle altogether. Often, it is a teacher who refuses to believe that success is not possible, insists on continued effort, suggests different strategies and approaches, and encourages students to persist until success is achieved. Memories of these struggles and pride in the outcome can build lifelong gratitude.

Modeling integrity and grace for students. Students notice when a teacher’s words match their actions—or when they don’t. Authenticity creates credibility. Students want to be confident that what a teacher tells them is what the teacher believes and lives. Students notice how teachers behave under pressure. Times of crisis, conflict, and drama are times when students pay particular attention to teacher behavior. Grace under pressure makes an impact. Calmness during emotional storms creates emotional and psychological safety and engenders confidence. Students often aspire to emulate the models of integrity and grace they were exposed to early in life.

The truth is that we have more influence on students’ lives than we realize. Unfortunately, we are unlikely to know the full impact we have had on the aspirations, achievements, and life views of most students we have taught and nurtured. However, if all or most of these five behaviors are part of our approach to students and our work, we can be confident that our influence is wide and profound for an inestimable number of students.

May 29, 2026

The Power of “Never”: Advice Students Won’t Forget

We typically avoid telling students what not to do in favor of giving them concrete, positive directions. For example, we might say, “Plant your feet on the sidewalk” rather than “Don’t walk on the grass.” Among the benefits of this approach is to give students a clear understanding of what is expected; we provide students with a clear picture of what to do, not just what not to do.

Nevertheless, there are some benefits attached to occasionally giving negatively framed advice. Negative framing can convey urgency. When framed as advice, what we say can feel protective rather than demanding. The unusualness of its negative framing can also make it memorable, and maybe even empowering. Advice framed as something one should never do can also feel more like guardrails for behavior rather than demands for compliance.

The end of the year is a good time to offer final advice and share our experiences and insights on life. Of course, we could frame our advice as positive and action-focused. However, we might find our advice to be even more effective if presented in a different frame. What if we shared our advice as “never ever do ____”? Here are seven examples of life advice that we can present as thinking and actions “never ever” to engage in.

Never ever allow someone to define who you are and what you can accomplish. No one has the right to define who another person is, nor can they determine what someone else can accomplish. Establish high goals, be your best self, and consider what someone else thinks only when they are aiming higher than you.

Insight: The future is yours to determine.

Never ever avoid something just because it is difficult this is where learning and life most often happen. Things that are challenging may not be pleasant, but they often offer the greatest rewards. Learning that requires struggle leads to deeper understanding and can stay in your memory longer.

Insight: What comes to us too easily often leaves us just as easily.

Never ever allow fear to keep you from going after what you want. Fear can be a powerful force, as it can make us hesitate and second-guess something we might later regret. However, fear should never come between what you want and what you will pursue. When something makes you fearful, ask yourself, “What would I do if I were not afraid?” The answer is often a good indicator of what you should do.

Insight: Fear wins when it keeps us from what we value and what we want to achieve.

Never ever trade what you really want for what you can have right now. When we are faced with the dilemma of an immediate reward and a delayed, even greater reward, we may be tempted to go for instant gratification. Unfortunately, while we may enjoy that immediate reward, before long we are likely to regret not waiting and working toward what we really want. It is true that working, saving, and persisting can take time and delay rewards, but waiting can be worth it.

Insight: Rewards that come after we have earned them almost always offer greater long-term happiness and satisfaction.

Never ever conflate a bad grade, a bad day, or a single bad experience with your worth. Life happens. Our experiences are not always what we choose. We make mistakes and missteps. Yet these are nothing more than incidents. They are not who we are. Mistakes are information we can use to improve, and missteps are just opportunities to learn and keep going. Much can be shown about our character in how we respond when something does not goes our way.

Insight: Success is determined by what we do with what happens to us, not the fact that it does.

Never ever allow a temporary setback to become a permanent condition. If we are learning, stretching, and growing, setbacks are inevitable. Trying things that do not work out the first time is part of life; they do not mean that we cannot succeed with reflection, new strategies, and practice. Setbacks may tell us what will not work, but they do not mean there is no path forward.

Insight: Setbacks can be lessons, but they are not verdicts on what is possible.

Never ever underestimate the power of small, consistent actions. Success in life is more likely to result from the small, seemingly insignificant things we do every day than it is to be the result of a single action or breakthrough. The power of this advice lies in the Japanese philosophy, kaizen. Kaizen involves learning and doing at least one thing every day to learn, grow, and make something better. Over time, the impact of many small actions can be huge for our success.

Insight: Without consistent actions in support of our goals, success in life is likely to remain more a dream than a reality.

We have worked hard to build impactful relationships with our students and to instill credibility in our guidance and advice. Consequently, what we share with students as they are about to leave us is likely to be heard and remembered. In fact, we should not be surprised if years from now, we encounter students who recall and can share specific life lessons, insights, and advice we taught them, especially at this time of year.

May 07, 2026

Seven Subtle Ways We Make Students Feel Seen and Valued

Students want to know and be frequently reassured that we see them, and they belong in our classroom. We might think that such reassurance should happen naturally. Often it does. However, some students seek and need more frequent reassurance than others.

Students pay attention to many seemingly small, subtle signs to reinforce that we notice and value their presence. The truth is that many students do not want us to be obvious and public in our messaging. They seek reassurance, not embarrassment.

The good news is that we send many of these messages naturally, without planning or spending extra time. If fact, when we see and respect our students, we often do and say things that reassure them. Here are seven of the most common and effective messages of noticing and inclusion.

Using students’ names to affirm and reinforce, not just to direct or correct. Saying things like “Good insight, Axel.” And “Interesting idea, Alice.” can send powerful messages about our valuing of and respect for students. The comfortable and natural use of students’ names reaffirms that we see and respect them.

Remembering seemingly small details. Students are especially sensitive to our recalling information about their interests, hobbies, and life. We might comment on a favorite book they mentioned, ask about a hobby they pursue, or we might ask about a sport, musical instrument, or project they are working on. Of course, knowing a student’s birthday and congratulating them can be a special bonus.

Engaging students at eye level. For young students this may mean our kneeling or sitting to better match their height. For older students standing near them and having eye contact without crowding or hovering can convey a similar message.

Responding non-verbally when students speak. We might nod our head, raise an eyebrow, or shrug our shoulders, depending on what the student is saying. How we physically respond can be equally or even more powerful than what we say in response.

Resisting the urge to interrupt or correct. We may think that we know what the student is going to say and we have the answer, we may want to immediately correct them, or we may just be in a hurry. Regardless, letting students speak without interruption is a sign of respect and worth.

Pausing briefly once students finish speaking. We might briefly pause to be sure the student is finished. We might provide space for the student to reflect and possibly think of something more to add. Or we might pause to reassure the student that we are listening and considering what they have said.

Recording and referencing what students say. We might turn and write a student’s idea or observation in a public space, such as on a whiteboard. Or we might later reference what a student has said in the context of our comments without necessarily using their name. For example, we might say, “Recall what someone earlier said…” The student will know that they were the source and we will have had the impact we intended.

We all want to feel as though we are noticed and belong. When we have this reassurance, we are freer to take risks, more confident in forming relationships, and freer to be ourselves. Our students feel the same. Fortunately, we have it in our power to create and offer this assurance.

March 05, 2026

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Share your story and the tips you have for getting through this challenging time. It can remind a fellow school leader of something they forgot, or your example can make a difficult task much easier and allow them to get more done in less time. We may publish your comments.

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Ten Signs a Current Student May Be a Future Teacher

It is a fact that tomorrow’s teachers are in today’s classrooms—and those among our students who will become educators likely do not even know it yet! They may not have considered teaching as a future path, or they may have even been discouraged from considering teaching as a career.

Yet there are students in our classrooms who likely demonstrate behaviors and characteristics that make them natural teachers. With encouragement, mentoring, and relevant experiences, they may grow an interest that leads them to choose teaching as a career and commit to a lifelong pursuit of making a difference in the lives of children and young people.

Of course, many of the behaviors that align with teaching can lead to other professions as well. However, we can expose and encourage students to consider the possibility that they might become teachers. We can help them to see themselves as someone who can have a profound impact on the lives of learners, who can stimulate curiosity, share useful knowledge, build important skills, and prepare students to become successful adults and good people.

So, what might we see and hear from students that suggest they have a latent or potential interest in teaching, and that they would find a good fit with teaching? Here are ten of the most common signs:

They are quick to explain ideas and routines to classmates. They are attentive to processes and procedures and they are comfortable translating for others—even without being asked or directed.
They volunteer to assist classmates who struggle. They are patient, empathetic, and understanding of the struggles other students may face.
They ask big picture questions. They want to know how things work. They are likely to be interested in how learning happens. They may inquire why we chose one approach or response over another.
They are quick to take a leadership role during group work. They may focus on ensuring that everyone is included and participates. They work to ensure that the group accomplishes its assigned task.
They pay attention to how lessons are designed and delivered. They may ask about teaching strategies and why certain approaches work better than others. At times, they may even offer suggestions and options for improvement.
They are attentive to classroom dynamics. They often are sensitive to the energy and mood in the room. They notice when some students do not participate or are confused or frustrated. They may even take steps to lower frustration and reduce conflict or come to their teacher’s defense when other students are being unkind to them.
They are quick to volunteer for classroom tasks. These are the students who look forward to opportunities such as distributing materials, setting up activities, and arranging space.
They can be counted on to help when a substitute teacher is struggling. Their grasp of how things are supposed to work and the expectations we hold are ready to be shared.
When given the opportunity to teach a lesson or present on a topic, they show promise. They may not be among the first to volunteer, but their natural teaching behaviors and skills come through.
They may ask about our experience. They may inquire about what led us to teach. They might ask us questions such as what teaching is like and what we like about teaching.

Of course, few students will demonstrate all or even most of these behaviors and characteristics. However, the more evidence we see, the more likely a student is to have a natural inclination to teach. We can also remind ourselves that future teachers do not have to be academically top-achieving students. Intellectual curiosity and capacity are important, but teaching success is also dependent on caring, connecting, and making an impact.

February 19, 2026

Not All Praise Is Equal: 3 Types to Choose and Use

Praise can be an effective way to compliment students, reinforce their behavior, and motivate them to do even better. However, not all types of praise are the same or equal. In fact, using certain types of praise can work against our goal of having students accept and use said praise to improve.

We might think of praise as falling into three categories: personal praise, effort-based praise, and behavior-specific praise. Each type of praise can play a role in relationships, but they are not all equally effective in motivating behavior. Let’s examine the types of praise we might choose to employ and how each might be perceived and utilized by students.

Personal praise is most common in general conversation. We might say things like, “You are so talented.” “You are a natural athlete.” Or “You are so good at math.” Our words may be true, and we may feel good having said them. What we say can also feel good to the student and temporarily build their confidence, but this type of praise is not a powerful motivator. In fact, personal praise is the least powerful type of praise. Personal praise typically focuses on things that come easily to students, such as talents, skills, and characteristics. These characteristics may be nice to have, but students are likely to see them as inherent qualities over which they have little control, and they may not be enough when the student faces the next task or challenge. Consequently, students may be reluctant to take future risks or persist in the face of difficult challenges, feeling that what we are praising is outside of their control and may not be enough to propel them to succeed.

The second type of praise is effort-based praise. We might use words like, “I can see how much effort you are putting into this task.” “You did not give up even though the work was hard.” Or “Your practice is making a big difference.” This type of praise focuses on strategies the student is using, the persistence they are demonstrating, and the improvement they are showing. Effort-based praise is more powerful because it emphasizes elements within the student’s control. It highlights investment of energy, effort, and focus, all of which students can manage. Praise for effort encourages students to continue and even increase their energy and effort investment. However, we need to be careful not to communicate that effort alone will always be enough or students may eventually give up without trying different approaches or searching for better tools and strategies.

A third category of praise is behavior-specific praise. When giving this type of praise we might say, “You stayed calm even though you were clearly frustrated.” “You paid close attention to details and avoided mistakes.” Or “You were organized and prepared and it showed.” Like effort-based praise, behavior-specific praise focuses on elements and actions that students can control. The power of this type of praise lies in its clarity and preciseness. It clarifies what is expected and reinforces its importance. Behavior-specific praise also reinforces actions that are repeatable. Further, since the focus is on what students have done correctly, they are better able to replicate and improve their work. They hear not just that they have done well, they have information to use going forward.

When choosing to use praise as a strategy to reinforce and stimulate behavior, there are several observations and considerations that warrant our attention:

Combining effort-based and behavior-specific praise is most the powerful form of praise.

Praise often needs to be paired with feedback to help students see their current state of progress, what has worked, and what might be good next steps.

Overuse of praise can reduce intrinsic motivation and lead to over dependence on the approval of others.

Praise students as soon as possible after they demonstrate the behavior to be reinforced.

Insincerity when giving praise can easily backfire as many students are especially sensitive to attempts to manipulate.

Avoid making comparisons to other students when giving praise.

In summary, we might choose to give students personal praise when an observation or compliment is all that we intend and there is no expectation for improvement. On the other hand, when we want students to understand what they have done well and how to do even better, effort-based and behavior specific praise are better options.

February 19, 2026

The High Costs of Motivating Students with Negative Approaches

Convincing students to do what we want and need them to do can be a challenge. Admittedly, some students are easily motivated by a challenge, a relevant topic, or even the expectation that they accomplish a task or learn a skill. Yet, other students respond less positively or not at all to generic motivational efforts and approaches. We may think that the only way to motivate them is to rely on fear, threats, shame, or criticism.

Negative motivational approaches often seem as though they work—at least in the near term. When we threaten students with negative consequences such as failure or public shame, they often comply—at least while we are watching. When the choice is to criticize students as being lazy or careless, it may seem that they give more effort or pay closer attention—for the moment.

However, negative motivational approaches often come with a high price. Consider:

Demands for compliance rarely result in long-term learning commitment.
Criticism can erode confidence in learning potential.
Threats can lead to avoidance of punishment or disapproval rather than learning driven by curiosity and creativity.
Discouraging and harsh comments are more apt to leave students feeling unsafe and disliked than motivated.
Coercive approaches are more likely to generate resentment, avoidance, and even defiance rather than to motivate.

Some people may argue that they know their students, and they are able to discern when a negative approach is necessary. In the short term, they might appear to have a point. They may seem to stimulate the behavior they demand via negative approaches. However, what is less obvious and more important are the long-term consequences that negative motivational attempts can generate such as:

Diminished trust.
Reduced self-respect.
Lower levels of self-confidence.
Weaker self-regulation behaviors and skills.
Increased dependence on others for direction.
Greater needs for external validation.

So, what are some positive alternatives to dependence on negative motivational strategies? Here are six options to consider and build on:

Correct behavior while affirming the student’s worth and potential.
Reaffirm student agency through choices, recognition of progress, and goal setting.
Offer positive pressure through attainable challenges, clear goals, and timely feedback and encouragement.
Connect learning to student interests, purpose, growth, and service to others.
Notice and reinforce effort, progress, and goal achievement.
Hold high expectations and support students to meet them.

Without question, motivation is a crucial element in learning. Finding ways to motivate and teach students how to motivate themselves can be challenging. However, resorting to negative motivational strategies comes with significant risks for students that can be lifelong. The additional time and thought required to stimulate learning interest and commitment via positive approaches are more than worth the effort and can benefit students long after they leave us.

January 21, 2026

Seven Common Teacher Phrases That Can Undermine Learning

Teaching involves lots of talking. We introduce new concepts and skills, provide guidance and support, offer feedback and direction—all of which require verbal cues and interactions. It is also true that what we say, the words we choose, and the timing of our communication matter.

Unfortunately, over time, our speech can fall into patterns that feel natural, but we may give little thought to the messages they carry. They may be phrases and statements that we heard from our teachers, or they may just seem useful in the moment. Nevertheless, what we say can have a greater impact than we realize. Let’s examine seven common teacher statements that can shut down engagement and undermine learning.

We don’t have time for questions.

We might be reluctant to interrupt a planned lesson or the flow of an ongoing explanation. However, questions are indicators of curiosity, confusion, and interest in learning. Ignoring or refusing questions risks stifling curiosity, deepening confusion, and fostering disengagement. Whenever practical, we need to take questions as they surface. If the answer to a question can wait, we might invite the student to hold the question and promise to address it at the conclusion of the current activity. Or we might signal that an opportunity for questions is coming soon and ask students to jot down their questions so they are captured and can be addressed.

I just explained this.

This statement may be correct, but if students were not listening, couldn’t hear us, or the explanation was not clear to them, they won’t be able to use our explanation to move their learning forward. Rather than pointing out that an explanation has been given, we might focus on what students did not hear or understand. Checking for understanding is likely to be more supportive of learning than focusing on what students should have heard and understood.

You need to try harder.

The amount of effort a student is giving may be inadequate to support development of the intended learning. However, effort is only one contributor to learning success. Focusing on effort alone can leave students feeling unable to succeed and with nowhere to turn. Good strategy, deep reflection, sense making, and effective use of resources also are crucial to learning growth. Balancing effort with other contributing elements can give students multiple places to find success.

This should be easy.

The fact is that what may seem easy to us or even for some other students may not be easy for all students. Declaring that a learning task should be easy risks discouraging or undermining the confidence of students for whom the new concept or skill requires struggle. The implication of the statement is that if the learning task is not easy, it is the students’ fault, or that the student is not a good learner.

You should already know this.

It may be true that we have already taught students what they need to know to be successful with a current learning challenge. However, our teaching is not the same as student learning and recall. Our verbal observation of what may be obvious suggests that the problem lies with the student, when the cause may be shared or at least more complicated. Rather than lamenting what students do not know or do not recall, our time will be better spent, and students will be better served by refreshing, reviewing, or reteaching what students need to know to be successful.

You are so smart.

On the surface, praising a student’s intelligence may seem like a good confidence builder. Yet, the statement implies that the student was successful because of his or her intelligence alone. Unfortunately, intelligence by itself can only take learning so far. Without good strategies and effective effort, students can encounter challenges for which their intelligence alone is no match. Consequently, students may give up, believing they are not smart enough to go any further. Alternatively, they may avoid learning challenges that risk revealing that they are not as intelligent as we assume.

Just follow these steps.

Following dictated steps might lead to a correct answer, but it does not necessarily lead to learning. Not knowing why or understanding the relationship between actions and outcomes can leave students dependent on remembering the steps to take, not why the steps are important or how they lead to a correct answer. Further, this admonition suggests that there is a single way of solving a problem or finding an answer, while in most situations multiple paths can lead to success.

We have much to say to students and they have much to learn from us. It is worth the effort to examine the common phrases we use and the exhortations we depend on to urge students to learn. We need to lift students up and focus their attention on where it will make the greatest difference. Consequently, we need to choose our words carefully.

January 15, 2026

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The High Costs of Motivating Students with Negative Approaches

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